Amplifying Accessibility: Jess Molloy

What’s your relationship with Accessibility and Disability Representation?

JESS
I’m very passionate about Accessibility in games, and making sure that everyone can participate, enjoy and communicate with everything we love about gaming.

I’m also Disabled, though I’m nicer to other people about their Disabilities than I am my own. Something of a learned behaviour right there. I’m someone who’s Disabled, and who’s always happy to answer questions about it – because people are curious, and that’s okay!

ELIZABETH
As they should be. And you do Accessibility Consultancy too, yes? What exactly does that entail?

JESS
I do! I do. So that entails looking over someone’s design or ongoing project, and seeing if there are any issues with Accessibility. If there are any quick and easy fixes; if there are any glaring issues that would completely cut people out of the experience. Spreading knowledge and awareness about Accessibility, and why its inclusion is so important.

Do you have a favourite piece of Disabled representation in gaming?

JESS
See, it’s difficult, because I can’t really think of that many Disabled characters in videogames – which is already a problem. I mean, I like characters that I design…? [Laughs] I like to include a bit of everyone. Tall people, short people, people who use wheelchairs… People who walk with canes, people who walk with dogs! But, uhh…

Yeah, I can’t think of any. I feel like that makes me… [sighs]

ELIZABETH
It makes you feel like you’re a bad gamer – because your breadth of knowledge just isn’t wide enough, clearly, to have those references offhand!

JESS
That’s exactly it! It makes me feel like a bad game developer, that I can’t think of anything. But… that’s also on the wider industry itself for not making it feel like this usual, natural thing in any of the worlds they’re creating.

ELIZABETH
Do you have a favourite from any of the characters you’ve designed?

JESS
It was pixel art, the characters I did, and I liked being able to create different kinds of walking sticks – because people use different types of walking aid! And people with different postures, and different kinds of wheelchairs. And it felt nice not to assume that everyone is the same!

They were very simplified, not super detailed – sort of silhouettes and block colours – but just the playing around with shapes was really interesting to me. And I’m really happy with how some of them turned out.

With representation, people tend to go immediately to gender and race – which is fair, because that’s very important – but it’s just a shame that Disability gets pushed away, almost.

ELIZABETH
Those, I think, feel very entry level to understanding differences between people. Like, they’re the first things you teach kids about equality, because there’s a more visual immediacy, generally speaking, when comparing someone who is White against Black, Brown, SWANA, etc.

Disability does feel like it’s fairly late in the game – no pun intended – when it comes to the differences people think of. Especially when it comes to invisible Disabilities. And they’ll latch onto the ones that seem easiest to understand; the really ‘extreme,’ or universally recognisable ones. A wheelchair user, blindness, deafness, etc… Whereas I’m yet to see representation of equally common but invisible conditions like endometriosis, for instance – which affects over 10% of people with a uterus worldwide.

JESS
So… this might be hard to hear – and say, to be honest – but as awful as COVID was… it was helpful for the games industry, in that everyone was inside playing games. And in another horrible way, with long Covid being very much a real thing, it has given people who would never had barriers before things like fatigue, tendencies toward migraines, lowered immune systems—

ELIZABETH
Very much a post-viral fatigue syndrome.

JESS
Exactly. Which has caused a greater awareness, because more people are suffering with it. COVID opened a lot of eyes about a lot of things, both about how we see the world and our governments, and how we see our own lives and bodies. And as horrible as I feel saying it, there was this kind of relief that came with that, as a Disabled person.

ELIZABETH
No, I know what you mean, because I had that too. My gut reaction was pure grief for all these people whose lives were about to be so affected. But then also just this creeping relief that I’m finally vindicated that it’s not all in my head – as I was told by my specialist the moment I turned 18. And, hopefully, there will be more concerted efforts moving forward into research into management of conditions like ours because of Long COVID, so nobody has to suffer the way many have already had to.

Because Disability is something I think people often don’t think of until it happens to them. You see those memes about people with a cold that’re lamenting how they took having two unblocked nostrils for granted when they weren’t sick – but now imagine that’s you, every day, with your whole body!

JESS
A lot of people only seem to care when it’s relevant to them. But it’s also very important to remember that Accessibility isn’t just there for Disabled people – it’s there for everyone! If you’re in a room full of very loud people, like a bar, and wanna watch the TV but don’t know what’s going on – you need subtitles! They’re not just there for hard of hearing people!

How do you think gaming and play interact with Disability?

JESS
So when I studied Health and Social Care, it touched a lot on the different ways people of all kinds use games. It can be a way of being alone, distracting themselves and having fun, or interacting with friends. So if you’re in the hospital, you can still play games with people and not be left out. You can have more active participation in situations like being hospitalised or bedbound by your symptoms, which, generally, are pretty passive or aren’t otherwise escapable. With a game, you can bring other people into that space – or yourself out of them. My psychology studies had similar emphasis on mental health, and doing things that make you feel good, and for a lot of people that can be gaming.

Videogames are an art form. For every game that people say isn’t a game, there is a film that people say shouldn’t be a film or is just terrible. It’s an art form that everyone deserves to be able to enjoy – or at least play with, even if they don’t end up liking it! At least they got to experience it themselves, rather than just hearing about it and missing out.

What do you think is most overlooked when it comes to Disability?

JESS
In games and stories, I would say the person is what often goes overlooked. I watched 30 Rock yesterday, and there was a blind character, and the whole gag was: “She’s blind! She doesn’t know where she’s going! We can walk her around, it’s fine!” She wasn’t even played by a blind actress.

When Disabled people are included in media, it tends to be either for a bit or, “Look, this person is Disabled! That is who they are! Everything that they are!”

Having a Disability is just part of you, and people seem to forget that you are a person as well! It’s not the only thing that defines you – if it defines you at all!

ELIZABETH
There’s definitely a lot of grey area around the act of defining yourself, too. Y’know, do you introduce yourself at a job interview as Disabled, so you can get those reasonable adjustments put in place from the moment you start? Or do you wait till you’ve got the job to declare it? Different companies will have all kinds of different processes and preferences, no matter if they claim to be equal opportunities, so which leap of faith do you even take?

JESS
I personally hide it until I know I’m safe, and have the job. And even then, I’d try and hide it anyway. There’s places I’ve worked previously where I napped in the toilet, because there was no place for me to rest when my body started giving out. At the time, I didn’t have a diagnosis, so I was kicking myself for just ‘being lazy’ – and, of course, if you assume that about yourself, you’re going to think everyone around you assumes the same. And it’s horrible.

With Glowmade, I knew they were good because they had you. Disability-wise, it has been life-changing to find people who have the same issues as me. And you were talking about them in your panel at Guildford.Games Fest, and really emphasising that Glowmade understood, but I was honestly still nervous about applying. Because what if I’m too much, or ask for too much too early, even if they are understanding?

I don’t know if it’s just me, as a Disabled person, but I don’t like to ask for help. So when I do ask for help, it’s because I need  it.

ELIZABETH
I’m exactly the same. It’s really hard to unlearn.

JESS
I’ve had thirty years to try to figure out what works for me. I know myself; I don’t need someone to say they’ll change the light bulbs just because you read ‘epilepsy’ on my list. But also it’s important to take people at face value when they do ask for help, because they’ve definitely already tried to avoid it. Take those requests seriously. Take us seriously! If you’re frustrated, imagine how they feel.

How can we ensure equity and Accessibility are fully present in game design moving forward?

JESS
Hire Disabled game developers. That’s pretty much it.

While it’s admirable that people can read up on Accessibility, it is not going to be the same thing as having a Disabled person. Regardless of implementing measures later down the line, or hiring Disabled testers, if you build it from the ground up with Accessibility in mind, you’ll be far better set up to make something that works. I mean, it’s not even Accessibility, really; it’s usability!

People hear Accessibility and they think, “Easy mode? Ew, I don’t want that in my Dark Souls!” But that’s not it. It’s making sure that people are able to access the core components of your game. There’s a reason Mario Kart is so big, and it’s because most people are able to play it because of the features!

Hire Disabled people. There’s no reason not to. There’s plenty of stigma already. I even saw someone on LinkedIn recently say: “If there are two people with identical portfolios, and one was ‘normal’ and the other Disabled, of course I’d hire the normal one!”

ELIZABETH
That’s actually horrendous.

JESS
It’s 2024! We can do everything just as well as non-Disabled people; we just might have a different way of doing it, or working to a slightly different time-frame. We’re not lazy, and we’re not helpless.

ELIZABETH
Arguably, we can comprise the hardest workers of any workforce, because think of everything we achieve despite constantly being held back!

JESS
Exactly! And we want to work! We want to be doing things, contributing, and making things happen! Have you tried sitting at home doing nothing lately? It’s exhausting, and it’s horrible to feel that you have nothing to offer. But we have so much to give! Just let us!

What do you look forward to most for the future of game development and representation?

JESS
That it will be better. I think it has to be. We’ve seen great improvements in gender representation over the last decade or so. And, to an extent, also with things like race, sexuality, and even age – though I would say not as much as we’d really like, just yet…

Hopefully that all improves at the same time that Disabled representation does. Just hire more diverse people. It’s so boring when everyone’s the same. You don’t understand anything if you talk to the same few people your entire life. There’s all kinds of different flavours to life, and we have to embrace them to serve what everyone wants to consume.

Lastly, what does Disability Pride mean to you?

JESS
This has been a tough one for me, for as long as I can remember.

The first Disability I was diagnosed with was epilepsy. And even though it was just a word… for me, everything changed. All of a sudden, everyone was walking on eggshells, treating me like I’d break if they spoke to me. In college, I was told I shouldn’t be using scissors in case I had a seizure.

I’d had this my whole life, but now there’s just a word attached to it, and you’re changing how you perceive me based on that. Nothing has changed. And with my other illnesses, like BPD, AuDHD, fibromyalgia… it felt like it kept happening.

Life is difficult. And, unfortunately, Disabilities make it harder. I didn’t understand how you could be proud. When people around me were celebrating Disability Pride, I didn’t understand. I understood Queer Pride, because I was like, “Yeah, you are who you are! Love is love!” But why would I want to celebrate my epilepsy? My mental health issues?

ELIZABETH
Mm. It’s not especially liberating to say: “These are the ways my body doesn’t function!” Because, in declaring a Disability, it can feel like it’s becoming someone else’s burden to now carry that knowledge and act accordingly.

JESS
Exactly. Any time it got to Disability Pride, I’d feel really down. It was a reminder that I was Disabled, that I’ve struggled and still struggle, and nothing had really changed. Until I spoke to my mentor, Harriet, about it. And I don’t remember exactly what she said, but it was along the lines of: “You’re proud of what you’ve achieved despite it.”

It’s not: “Hurray, fibromyalgia!”

It’s: “Hurray, me! I have fibro, but look what I’ve still done!”

And that changed a lot for me. It is still hard, I find. I still don’t really get it, all the time, but I’m happy for other people who feel it better than I can. Because they deserve to feel pride and achievement and belonging. I’m very very happy for them.